Dear committee members of the Local Car Club racing circuit,
When my doctor told me I have narcolepsy, I thought my racing career was over. But good drivers don’t give up so easily.
As you’re aware, last April I fell asleep in pole position. Thank the Lord I hadn’t started the started the race, and only drifted into the forward car causing minor damage to Tony Selenti’s #14 bumper. We’ve since made amends.
After that incident, my doctor confirmed the worst, and I took time off from the circuit as you all had strongly suggested. It was a dark time, I’m not afraid to say. But in my darkest hours came inspiration. One Sunday morning as I drove my wife to church, she began shrieking about my doctor’s orders and how I was “putting everyone’s life at risk”. This went on for a good 30 minutes, when it finally occurred to me I had never felt more awake!
So, I’ve addressed the main issue with a copilot. My wife would never agree to join me during a race, but I was able to find a partner on Craigslist that would accompany me on the track and play a recording of my wife as I drove. This would ensure I remained alert and awake during the tense moments of the upcoming Oktoberfest Fall Classic race, October 26.
At your earliest convenience, I’m ready to qualify for the upcoming race and prove that narcolepsy and poor vision are no match for the human spirit.
Regards,
Vance Howard